On Gambling

I must hereby report that in my earlier years, from ages 23 to approximately age 29, I pursued the passion (heresy) of gambling.  I was never a gambler in college, never betting on sports or the like, never engaging in any games of chance prior to my very first experience in a casino.  I did however like games and perhaps thats the formula to a tragedy in the casinos.   I liked video games, board games, card games and all the like. 
In 1995, I was in Tahoe with 2 friends of mine.  We happened into the casino.  The first bet I ever placed was on black 28 on a roulette board.  1 dollar bet.   It hit.  I took in 35 dollars.  At first I was excited and happy, having what I considered an earned sum of fortune.  It didnt take long before I found myself, having not even planned to gamble or even considered the gambling 'sport' when I went to Tahoe, at the next table and a few other games.  I think in all I lost about 80 dollars.  
Simple experience. A lesson?   Not quite.
I found myself eager to visit Las Vegas after that.  Having never wished to ever go there before and having no prior fascination with casino gambling, I found myself in the beginning of 1996 visiting Vegas with some friends of mine.  That said, I was hooked.  I couldn't stay off the tables.  Baccarat, Black Jack, all weekend.  I wont report the sum that was lost, but I will report I never ever was ahead the entire experience.  I will report that at one moment, a trusted friend approached me concerned about my gambling.  I listened to his counsel, but ascertained that I had a good future and money was expected in my futures and abundant.  I was so ever wrong and walked out of this weekend down an inordinate sum of my to date savings.  I must report that I had at one point been up all night thinking that I would earn back what I had lost.  I exceeded at that point my prepreposed acceptable losses by 100%.   
I did not change my ways.  Even after leaving and feeling much remorse over the amount gambled and lost, I still had a fascination for the casino culture.  I found myself in Texas, a state without gambling and on one occasion made my way to Louisiana.   I was actualy up 900 dollars at one point but in the remaining hours I lost all or most of that.   I returned to Las Vegas 2 more times, albeit much more conservative and only going over my prepreposed limit by about 30% on the first return visit.  I went to gambling venues in a number of smaller cities after that, none to ever find a beneficial return on my risked portion. 
The lesson for me was this:  I was never satisfied at all ever in any way gambling.  I needed more satisfaction. Win a little bit?  I needed to win more.   Lose?  I'd consider that I'd be able to win more soon.
I never was financially devistated overall in a complete and utter horrible fashion, but I was not in a good situation.  I borrowed finances that year and a few times in upcoming years. 
I must extol to anyone who considers gambling a pleasure that it is not only a vice, but a pagan heresy as well.  Upon my research, and from the website http://www.dailyhalacha.com/ , I was able to ascertain that the Jewish beliefs on gambling are not entirely straight foward.  It in one account was likened to stealing as if you win, the person/casino you won from is not happy to part with the finances.   I did read that the Jewish belief does not discriminate against those who wish to play the lottery. (fortunately one that I never ever had an inkling of a desire to try more than maybe a few minimal times).  It was written that if our Creator wants you to win, you should be able to win by just buying one ticket.  Multiple tickets are therefore frowned upon.
That said, I am flabbergasted when I meet people and they tell me how much they value their casino gambling experiences today.  I can not appreciate how any person can find that to be satisfying at any level, though sure you do have some fun moments and the free drinks can be an enjoyed fringe "gratuity".  I miss that it was indeed a venue where by some of my friends and myself were able to reunite.  But that said, perhaps a better reunion would be spent in other activities. 
So, the last time I was gambling was in 2005? when I went  to Detroit with my father and mother.  I can only report that I lost about 100 dollars.  Not terrible.  I was always fond of Craps after I learned the game, having amassed fortunes on some rolls.   But that said,  I always found a losing outcome.
Gambling is a counter culture that has become uber popular in years gone by since the 1990s whereby almost every large city in the United States now has gambling facilities.   Remarkable that we do not see more stories of disquietude, deficit, poverty, pain, suffering and heartless pursuits of illusionary gain.