Why you should eat kosher...

I eat kosher today.  No surprise huh?
I eat as best I can, but if it is a forbidden meat, I will not touch it.

Here is what I think I know about the kosher restrictions and why they really work in many good ways for you and your whole being:

If you eat a meat that is considered an abomination, you are going to result in a situation of weakness in your entire being.  This may sound weak and strange, and everyone who does not grow up kosher loves crab meat and pork and lobster, right?

I profess I did love all of those abominations.  I am cured of my insanity and unwellness.

To speak freely here, I will make the following suggestions.  You decide if they apply to who you want to be:

Eating pork cures your heart with hell.  I suggest that if you do not cure your heart with hell, you will cure it with fire.

Eating lobster and crab builds your wall with shit.  I suggest that if you do not do this, you will build your wall with blessings.

Eating octopus and eel and the like will drain your tank with sludge.  I suggest that you may wish to forgo those types of experiments and drain your tank with patience instead.

Eating all the rest is all equally undersirable.  I have figured many out, but I will not share as some get into some nauseating detail of their associations with your being. 
Suffice to say, I can not think that curing your heart with pork is a good thing to do.  I will cure my heart with fire. 

Either way, eat at your own risk.

I will say this here,
I think that if you eat moose you will build your owls nest.  Probably a good thing.  Perhaps this is why Sarah Palin enjoys so much soup from the world.
I think that if you eat giraffe, you will build your own back side.  I will definately try giraffe if I get the chance someday, kosher cut or not.  

So eat well and think about what you are doing to yourself.