This is going to seem like a frivolous post, but I assure you that in my unconscious thought and mind, there is a major malfunction that I intend to correct liberally in the presence of detailed blog entry as well as financial considerations.
In the year 1983-1984 school year while I was a 11-12 year old 6th grade grade school child, I was in an unpleasant situation whereby a fellow classmate was making a situation that I perceived to be intolerant. I was a silly kid but I was not a turkey baster. I was noting that often this particular friend would be in my presence and in the presence of other persons and then there would be a sweet and malodorous aroma of a likely flatus in our vicinity. I was often mortified because the culprit I do hold responsible would break out in hideous laughter and ridicule me, myself as the "true" culprit of such malodorous emissions. I was mortified and I do know that it was indeed the gaseous emissions of this said friend I will refer to as "T". T was a bright star and I know him well. Fortunately we are both cordial and have always been so. But that said, I broke laws of man, God and humanity as on the playground soon to follow, I clenched a Godless fist and let it fly through the air with physical force and landed a punch square in his face, though it was not a terrible harming punch and it did not do any physical harm other than mentally torment my friend. He was indeed a fellow of the law and did no such activity to escalate the situation and I earnest abandoned the cause of vengeance to walk away and never mention the said event in the future.
Until this week. I must admit that I am not a terrorist of that nature having been in a few minor scuffs as a young grade school patriot. I did get attacked by one other student and likely responded with a punch or two. I also once sent a righteous block to the face of a neighbor son who was malevolently attacking my brother with pushing and ridicule at the bus stop one day. In that case, the student was afforded a bloodied nose and he went home to miss school. He has since left our town to where I do not know, his name I will note to be "DM". I must say that DM had his "revenge" as he later that month employed the services of a martial arts expert to teach him the fine art of malevolently resolving conflict with force and combat skills. DM later entered an altercation with me on his front yard and he knocked me into a tussle where by I got no harmful hits in and he indeed likely bloodied my nose or probably more likely gave me a fat lip. I don't think my nose was bloodied. It was most likely the lip. So a lip for a nose. That's not exactly an "eye for an eye". I feel no remorse regarding DM and I can only hope that he and his military affiliated father are healing from their own heresy and blasphemy against life and mankind. That was not the proper way to address a bloodied nose that me being again likely 12 years old was afforded to provide.
So that said, the situation with T was much more difficult. I never considered it much and I do believe that T was well aware he was guilty of a true transgression. We remain allies though I admit we are not close brothers in life today. We are distant and friendly brothers. We chat and often exchange an email greeting once in a while. He does indeed keep me in his thoughts I am certain.
So that said, I did feel that my consciousness was not at all clear. I must report that for a good time I do have to say I have had a dream experience where he is often present and in many times in my dreams there is enmity between ourselves. In fact, my dreams have indicated that I have been in a very seriously harming fist fight by my own volition with him at an older time in my development. I felt alien in my dream to his family and I felt likely that it may not be a serious conflict in our true relationship, but if there is a spiritual world that I am yet to comprehend in full form, this was a major transgression manifesting itself as a dream whereby I was a forgiven villain by my Creator, but that the enmity continued to exist among our friendship. It may indeed do so at a minor but true subconscious level. Perhaps I can not correct my friends spirit but perhaps I can do my best to say and do what I do and hereby expose myself to the scrutiny of humanity by saying that I indeed do feel that blogging this will clean my consciousness of the said affair. I do not know if, when or how my dreams will improve but I am betting that is a likelihood.
I decided last night to make a financial contribution to a Regional Trauma Center. I gave 18 dollars to the University of Nevada in Las Vegas Trauma Center program. This site was chosen as we were last close friend-wise when we were indeed participating in a friend sponsored event in Las Vegas, NV. We are friends mind you. But lets be true friends spiritually as well as in daily personal contacts.
So that's my story. Take it or leave it, I say my bill of health is squeaky clean in this regard and I do not know if he is going to feel the suffering or not in the future but if his spirit is in this universe as I know it to be, he may or may not be recruited to be a true ally of myself and my Creator whom I represent as I am a Jew.
p.s. for better or worse, I shot him an email and informed him that I made the said contribution and that it was due to my dream state that was not right with myself. Seemed fine. I do not wish to rehash the crime, but its true that it is a contention in our spiritual experiences and that I do in fact have an obligation by the laws regarding our people to make the restitution known to the one who was indeed maimed by the prohibited affair. Thanks!
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