What is stopping most jews from congregating and becoming orthodox today is that the Jewish people are starved for their own personal edification and thus those who are in the highly religious circles, rather than seeking others to share life experience with overall, do in some ways keep ultra stringencies which to most people are not exactly the kosher they had in mind and to the rest are just a way of the ultra orthodox to absolve themselves of the candor of the trust that is really in the Israel Nation rather than the trust that exists just behind closed doors in the orthodox community.
Namely, I think that this rests on the Shabbas Observance.
Shabbas is a cornerstone of course of Jewish existence, but I profess that Torah does not say "Thou shalt not travel on shabbas or that thou shalt not energize your bunny rabbit" on shabbas either.
In fact, most of the non religious jews likely have become non-religious as many do not share the ultra orthodox's conditions of shabbas impairment versus perfection.
Shabbas is very relavant and necessary, but if you choose to say turn on the television set, this does not mean you are "not orthodox".
I think that the very fact that when I call an orthodox synagogue and they seem to want to assess me even before they have spoken to me face to face, I am reluctant to think that a positive experience is an absolute in the future. I have been assessed over the phone in calling orthodox shuls so far as to whether I am yet married and whether I am "observant". I usually dodge the minutia, but since I was able to say that I do not drive on shabbas, I think that it was proudly a way to say "I'm not the terrorist in the Jewish world that you think most people are today!!!!!!".
So lets be with it here. The idea is Kiruv, the idea is to bring other people close to Torah and Jewish life. This does not mean stand next to them and see who is taller or who has a new dimple on their blessings in life. This means wait for the information to come to you and then make use of it as you may to bring them closer to G-d. Not for you to distance yourself or "prepare" for the horrible incident you expect is just around the corner.
So if you ask me, let be nice to one another.
If I want to someday fly on shabbas, that is my perogative.
If I want to work on the bank line on shabbas, that really is an issue.
If I work in health care and I have saturday hours, that is a mitzvah, not a transgression.
So lets get with the true Shabbas Program.
Hashem did not send 6 plus million Jews to live in America to make us doubtful of our very own lifestyle because the neighbors are watching college football on saturday and we just know that we can not absolutely use any electricity on shabbas. As there are some who say, sparks are Unholy!!!!!!!!!
What about that shag rug you have in your living area? Do you not make sparks when you touch the doorknob in the wintertime? Is this not electricity? Surely our Creator did not intend for us to live on wooden and clay floors for the future?
And on that topic, I must say that if you like to unscrew the bulb on your refridgerator, please consider that your whole humble experience in your pre shabbas preparation is simply running around preventing a crime scene on shabbas. Is this how Our Creator created humanity? To have a crime scene initiative before every day of Rest? ABSURD.
So for me, I did try it your way in the past and for a whole year I might add. I was confused, fretful and I really did not have a positive outlook on my friends, family and the future of our Jewish people.
Suffice to say Shabbas is a DAY OF REST. Not a Day of affliction and not a day of asceticism overall. If you want to be ascetic, do it a bit, but its not our G-ds way to make us all ascetics for the entirety of our years. Do it if you are trying to repent. Do not do it to make an important impression on the world at large. I can basically assure you that the powers that be in this universe do not think you must be an ascetic for your whole of your life and if you do, you might just make yourself into a sad case in the heavens.
Just a thought.